Whatever happened to basic human decency?

I contemplated not writing this blog post because I was furious about this all day and it doesn’t really keep to the positive vibe I try to maintain in this blog…..nevertheless, I feel like it must be said.

Today was a particularly rough day. It started off fantastic – breakfast and chit-chat with my housemate is always a good day starter – and I was really excited to be going to the GUESS holiday preview. This is an event that I spent time in advance planning out my outfit for (in hind sight now wishing I had picked something different). Any of you who really know me also know that I never put time and effort into choosing an outfit….well, hardly ever. So, yes…I was excited.

No, this isn’t a story about me being made fun of for the outfit that I invested so much time into or anything like that; I wish it was that small. My traumatic day is much worse. I was heading to the bus stop and was maliciously attacked by a bug that decided to fly right up my nose. No, it didn’t just hit my face….it went right up my nose. So, I began blowing my nose to try and get it out, all the while coughing because it started to feel like it was in my throat, which lead to me throwing up on the side of the road (and trying desperately to not get anything on my outfit, since I put so much effort into it). Believe it or not, this isn’t the traumatic part; I wish it was that small.

While I’m throwing up on the side of the road, I saw a car drive past me with the driver clearly taking note of what was going on. Or so I thought. He most certainly took note of me. Once I was finished purging the unwanted foreign body from my own, I was walking back toward the bus bench and low-and-behold this car comes back around. The occupant was a younger male, could have been no more than 30, and he seemed to be asking me if I was ok. I said that I was and thanked him for his concern. He then proceeded to ask me if I could give him directions. The first place he asked directions to I couldn’t help him out with since I had no clue how to get there, so he then asked for a more general and well known location which I was familiar with. I stepped a little closer to the car so that he could hear my directions better, and at this point – after at least 15 seconds of talking to this guy already – I then realize that he was talking to me with penis in hand. I was being a kind person trying to help out, and he was being a skeezy perv just helping himself. I was so unbelievably insulted, violated, and just ridiculously upset. I backed away from the car clearly furious and he drove off. If I had been able to see his license plate I would have called the cops because as far as I’m concerned, that’s a form of sexual assault.

Yes, I promise, that’s as bad as my day gets. Can it really get much worse than that? The only thing that makes this story worse is that this isn’t the first time this has happened to me. Each time this unbelievably violating experience occurs, I am in the most innocent-looking clothing too. Today I had on a long skirt that pretty much went down to my ankles, with a high waist, and a cropped white lace top with capped sleeves. Because of the high waist on the skirt there was no midriff skin really showing and the most you could see was some of my arms and my ankles and whatever my sandals didn’t cover of my feet; the time before I was even more innocent looking. Of course the fact that I look like a pre-teen even though I’m in my mid 20’s makes this even worse; these pervs are preying on young, innocent, and vulnerable girls. It sickens me to my very core. What is behind this desire to defile innocence?

I told one person this story today and the response I got was “that’s a price you have to pay for being pretty I guess.” NO! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! In no way is that something that should be expected or accepted. I keep on hearing this same issue come up over and over again and I'm so tired of hearing it: blaming the victim. It doesn’t matter how pretty a girl is, she shouldn’t have to expect and accept such lewd and unwanted attention. Just like it is never a woman’s fault if she gets rapped, no matter how she is dressed, and it is not the fault of the young black boy wearing a hoodie walking home with a pop and a bag of skittles that he got shot.

Oh yes, I went there. RIP Trayvon Martin, you are a martyr and George Zimmerman is an ignorant racist cold-hearted fool who, if he doesn’t get what is coming to him through the legal system, will most certainly have to watch his back because it will be the biggest outrage of this century.

Ok, enough of the highly political aside. All I’m wondering is, on what planet is this behaviour ok? Where have all of the good men gone? Where are all of the gentlemen? I’m not really expecting a man to come up to me on the street and tell me that I have bewitched him body and soul – although that would be fantastic! – I just don’t understand how it is possibly too difficult to merely say “hi, I find you attractive, here is my number should you care to have an innocent coffee with me at some point in the near future. The ball is in your court.” I really don’t think that I am asking too much here.

No, instead I get hot-and-bothered psychos who usually skip any form of talking and go right to personally treating themselves. Sick. Very very sick. I think I’m going to invest in pepper spray and make sure that if this ever happens again, the perv will NEVER do this to any other girl ever again because all he’ll be able to think about is the sheer burning for days that he experienced last time, and it probably won’t be just his eyes.

I guess all I can say is:

               

Where have all the good men gone

and where are all the gods?

            Where’s the street-wise Hercules

            To fight the rising odds?

            Isn’t there a white knight

upon a fiery steed?

Late at night I toss and I turn

And I dream of what I need.

I need a hero

I’m holding out for a hero till the end of the night

He’s gotta be strong

And he’s gotta be fast

And he’s gotta be fresh from the fight.

I need a hero

I’m holding out for a hero till the morning light

He’s gotta be sure

And he’s gotta be soon

And he’s gotta be larger than life!